Since I revert, I got a lot of gifts from brothers and sisters. Alhamdulilah. Those were Islamic books, CDs, clothes, Hijabs and pins and there was one time I got lots of Hijabs when my Malaysian host family, 4 years of relationship with them, came to Japan to see me to celebrate my revert.
When I saw them, host mother opened the box and showed me a full of colorful Hijabs inside, telling me “I got this from my best friend and this one from my another best friend…” I was so happy to see each hijabs has own stories to tell all the way from Malaysia to Japan. When she showed me various Hijabs, the brilliant pink color hijab with crystal stones caught my eyes. When I took it in hand she told me “this is my best friend as well, I asked her to make the special one for you” it turned out the stones are sawed by hand. Of course, other hijabs are beautiful too but during the time I really wanted to put the pink one on me so I ask her help to wear it nicely then we went out for sightseeing in Shinjyuku, Tokyo.
While I was walking with them, thinking, “I chose pink to wear by myself. What a surprise…” As I usually prefer to wear a dark color like black, dark blue and gray for an outfit, I guess this is my typical Japanese fashion taste, and I never wear bright color especially pink with cloth or accessories as I felt it might look too feminine unlike my character and does not fit on my appearance. When I glanced at the shop windows to see myself, it was really pink! Apparently, that was the outstanding pink color in Tokyo surrounded by autumn leaves.
Interestingly compare with the occasion when I go out with wearing dark color hijab, I did not feel staring eyes on me with the pinky blight hijab. People might consider me as foreigner directly so they do not try hard to figure out who I am from my appearance. It does not mean I want to hide the fact that I am Japanese Muslim revert at all but it was easier for me when I feel fewer eyes. Another surprising feeling with the pink hijab was that I simply felt good as for wearing beautiful color on me like I put my favorite colors on my lips. It makes me feel I am proud of myself as I wear hijab to express who I am too.
Then I realized I tend to choose dark colors to avoid eye-catching in Tokyo. Even it seems logical enough to avoid people’s eyes on me but I found myself consider wearing hijab as with negative attitude somehow, try not too outstanding among people for catching their eyes. The pink hijab, however, brings me to think wearing hijab is a truly good thing, is the way I carry out my belief. It encourages me to be proud of myself as well. Now I am getting a little confidence to try to wear hijab more often in Tokyo to keep my faith and proudly express myself as Muslimah. Inshallah